I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
Randomize
