I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
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