He asked me if I "almost moaned"
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
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