Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
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