I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
