I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
Randomize
