So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
