I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
Randomize
