no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Randomize