You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize
