So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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