come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
Randomize
