after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
It's no shave November. This is our time.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
