yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Randomize
