we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize
