i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
Randomize
