no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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