sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Sex in the backyard? Check.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
