I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
Every concussion has its silver lining
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
Randomize
