I have demons in me.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
Randomize
