I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
