why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
Randomize
