ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
Randomize
