This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
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