I need help removing her.
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I spilled a beer on myself, so I went back to my place to change. The city marshall was at my door with a warrant. That beer cost me 760 bucks.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Randomize