I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Randomize