why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
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