when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
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