Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
