So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
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