Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
