I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
