This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
I just blew my weed a kiss
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
I can't put those talents on a resume
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
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