Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Randomize
