Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
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