I hate all girls vehemently.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
