i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
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