I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
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