I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
