Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
Randomize
