508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
