fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
That reminds me...we need to get swords
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
