she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
You ate ashes out of my bong
Randomize
