you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
Banned from zoo.
Again?
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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