I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
