Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize
