If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Randomize