Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
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