new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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