The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
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