how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
Randomize
