how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
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