I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
Randomize